Dad's Black Jacket, Part 2, Consistency

There are things that I love about my dad other than the fact that he has a signature jacket - many things, in fact.  Some, like the jacket, I love simply because they have come to represent "Dad" to me...and having a Dad and loving a Dad and being raised and loved and cared for by a Dad (and a mom who rocks, btw) are all good and lovely things in my book.  Other things about him, I love because they are simply lovable, beautiful, sometimes surprising aspects of a person who I cherish.


I love that he calls me "Sweetie", "Babe", and several other endearing names and gives kisses on the head and pats when he hugs.  I love that he picks up his cell phone almost always if I call, even if he's in a meeting.  I love that when he is in town visiting, I can count on waking up to the smell of coffee even if it's still dark outside because he wakes up THAT early.  He always has.  I have so many wonderful childhood memories of waking up on vacations to that same smell of coffee and the sound of Mom and Dad's whispering voices as they started their daily coffee and quiet time routine and I rolled over to go back to sleep.  The fact that he wakes up crazy early is surely, at least partially, tied to his drive and perfectionism that tell him "sleeping in" (and we're talking about 7 a.m. here, folks) means wasting the day and being unproductive, but I still love this about him.  Because it is what I've always known.  It is consistent and dependable.  Like his black jacket.  And though I wish for his own sake he could sleep until 7 or 8 a.m. one day and not feel guilty about it, I do love me some consistency.

And while it is normal for each of us to love and cherish the things about each other that are consistent and predictable, I think love also requires us to leave tons of space for change.  I used to be the girl who was obsessed with laying out and getting as tan as possible on vacation (read: burnt to a crisp).  One year, that suddenly changed and I started wearing SPF 30 or 45 in Mexico and stayed in the shade a lot.  My family didn't know what to do with me.  They resisted this change at first, not because they in any way cared whether I was obsessed with sun tanning or not, but because the Ginger that they had known and loved for 23 years loved getting tan at any cost.  But, like all people who truly love someone, they eventually made room for the new Ginger to find her place, SPF and all.

We all continually change and grow - it is part of being alive.  If we aren't changing and growing, we are dying.  And we don't want death for the people we love.  We want life.  And, as it was with me and my SPF drama, typically we all find balance in the end.  I went from a cancer bomb waiting to go off to a pasty, white shade-sitter and eventually found balance for myself somewhere in the middle, slathered in SPF 30 while basking in the sun.

So, Dad, if you ever want to start wearing flip flop sandals every day, or if you want to sleep in (I hope you at least dabble in this, for your sake) :) or start drinking tea in the morning instead of coffee, or if <gasp> you decide to lay to rest Dad's Black Jacket, I will love you just as much as I always have.  I will love the new things about you (in time) as much as I love the predictable things.  I will love these things because I love you, and when people are alive they change all the time.  And I want you to be as alive and free and full of Life and joy as you can possibly be.